Struggling and Trusting

In my last post I alluded to some struggles that Mum and I were having. Three years ago we bought, off the plans, an apartment in Wellington as an investment property. The building was to be completed in May of this year (which it was). The apartment was a 46 sq m 2 bedroom unfurnished one, on the 3rd floor, right in the middle of Wellington's thriving city centre.



Over the next three years we were continually updated on progress. In the meantime, Mum had come up with an idea that involved buying land in the Philippines, building apartment blocks on it and selling them as a way of helping her family and us, as the initial outlay was low, from our end, the NZ-Philippine exchange rate being what it is, and the return would be good.

We were unable to do this as we had to keep our borrowings down so we had enough to pay for the apartment when it was completed ($302,000).


So anyway, the apartment was completed, we borrowed the money and took possession, finding a good property management company to find us tenants and take care of the apartment.

We had to put whiteware (stove, fridge, washing machine and drier and microwave) and blinds in, at additional cost (about $3500), which we had to use our savings for. Also, because of the recession the value had decreased from $302K to $282K (apparently in Auckland it would have dropped by $100K!).


Anway, we both felt like we wished that we hadn't bought the thing in the first place, as we had already lost money on it and it was costing us more money than we had anticipated to set up. We'd been assured that it could rent for anywhere from $420 to $440 a week, but again, because of the recession, that had sunk to $360 by the time it was built. We had real misgivings.

And we weren't able to find a tenant. One had been found but then had pulled out, so we had to cover the mortgage ($1320 a month) until we could get one.


One night I was lying in bed around midnight thinking about it. A whole bunch of scriptures and thoughts rolled through my mind, particularly the ones related to tithing. We'd just had tithing settlement that evening and I thought about the amount of tithing we'd paid, and knew that that amount of money would have gone a long way to easing the burdens on us. Not that I was regretting paying it, but that I realised what an act of faith and trust paying tithing is. I felt a strong sense of assurance that we would be okay and that the apartment would turn out to be a blessing to us.


The next morning I was reading my scriptures and I happened to be up to Nephi's psalm; there were a lot of verses in that chapter which I felt had direct application to how I was feeling, very reassuring, encouraging thoughts that Nephi epxressed. Trusting Heavenly Father has been a big thing for me since the really beautiful experience I'd had when I'd been pouring my heart out in prayer about Curtis back when he was about 14. I felt very reassured that we would be okay.


But we still couldn't find a tenant and the property managers were saying that prospective tenants were saying it was too small and that's why we weren't getting anyone. Also, it was a building of 300+ apartments and only 30% tenanted, so we were told that there was a glut on the market. As each of these bits of information came through they left cold chills. Very expensive for us and very stressful for Mum. It meant that we had no money for anything other than essential needs, and barely enough for that - no money for sending to Uncle Rey or for anything else. I had visions of us going for months and months without a tenant, meaning that we wouldn't be able to afford to be at Simon's graduation.


We fasted and prayed frequently, but still nothing. Mum was getting worried and depressed, and I was worrying to. I had many thoughts which made me look at just how much I trusted Heavenly Father - we needed a tenant not so we could free up our money to buy fancy things for ourselves but so we could help Mum's family, who depended on us. So it was very hard to understand why we were in this situation. I had had to give a talk in stake conference about trusting, and I was having a hard time putting my money where my mouth was in this situation. We continued to fast and pray. We reviewed our own lives and looked at what we needed to learn from this trial, so we repented where we needed to and tried to keep trusting. From time to time we would have feelings of reassurance that helped us - we would read a conference talk or a scripture or just have a sense that we were known about and cared about.


But even with that the financial pressure remained. It's funny how money (lacking it especially!) can be such a test, especially when you think it wouldn't be. But we continued to trust and just wait on the Lord.


In the middle of this Mum got called to be Relief Society president. The property managers had suggested we drop the asking rent from $360 a week to $340, so I told them to do it. That would put further pressure on us, even if we could rent ti, but had no choice, we needed to get it rented.


Then we got a phone call out of the blue from another property management company asking if we had found a tenant yet. He had tracked us down through a bit of detective work, and assured us he could get us a tenant. The next morning the very first scripture I read was Enos 1:12: "And it came to pass that after I had prayed and fasted with all diligence, the Lord said unto me: I will grant unto thee according to thy desires, because of thy faith". That was a tremendous reassurance and, I felt, a direct answer from the Lord as to what we should do. So we decided to let the new guy have a go. We let the original managers know we were going to use this guy too, which they were okay with.


He found us a tenant in two days, and at $360 not $340. I got a phone call from him Tuesday afternoon telling us he had the lease all signed up, so I went to my email to let the original property managers know we had finally had a tenant, and an email from them was waiting saying that they had found us a tenant, but at $340 rent!


So, to summarise: we waited, we trusted, we fasted and prayed, we worried, at times I doubted, we pestered the Lord, reminded him of our obedience in paying our tithing and of his promises; the experience really made me think through just how strong my testimony was, and how far I was prepared to trust my Father in Heaven, and to gain more understanding of the difference between having a testimony when all is well and when you're actually "under fire". It made me focus myself much more spiritually.


But after the test, the blessing came, the promise is fulfilled and we have had the financial pressure relieved. We feel very blessed!